Letting go of the stress. We often hold on to things that do not matter. We listen to all of the criticisms and take them to heart. Our society can be a very judgmental place. We allow ourselves to internalize negative experiences when we do not have to. The decision to allow is up to us. It is so easy for me to tell you to not let things get to you but there is a process to this that we need to learn before we can condition ourselves to do so.
Before we can be a steel wall against the bad perceptions in our lives we need to have confidence in ourselves. In order to have confidence in ourselves we have to love ourselves. Loving ourselves is easier said than done. If we look in the mirror we always see our pain or the most recent thing we are thinking about. We look into our eyes and we cannot lie to ourselves. We are there. We are alive. We are ready to snap at ourselves. We have to remain focused and give our self a chance to breathe away from ourselves. We make excuses for our pain and challenges. We do not take responsibility nor do we accept that our unhappiness is of our own doing. For the most of us we are self-destructive. Everyone around us suffers and we are selfish. We take the notion that everyone is to blame for our unhappy thoughts and experiences. We do not realize how powerful we are and that we have the capacity to change our world at any given time. Sometimes after we make the decision it is instant sometimes the change happens over a period of time.
Where do we start? How do we change our lives? Again I go back to being happy. Before we can be happy we have to love ourselves. Practice writing down on a piece of paper all of our good qualities every day. At least write these descriptive words about ourselves twice a week. We have to Get in the habit of speaking good things about ourselves because that is the best way to condition or positively brainwash ourselves. That is pretty bad that we have to brainwash our self to believe we are good people. We are. We are powerful!
Record your voice on your smart phone and listen to yourself speak well of yourself. Make a video… I can go in circles with this. I know so many people that are in denial that they are unhappy with themselves. They are also the most negative people I know. They smile, laugh and give excuses for their challenges. They are convinced that their plight is worse. You tell them of your situation and or challenge and they give a response that is letting all know they don’t care because it is not about anyone else but them at this point. They want to manipulate the conversation always about them. This is not done in an intentional manner. It is innocent because they truly believe that are in a worse place than you. At this point all we can do is show them unconditional love and remind them how amazing they are and that we have control over everything. Which we do.
We have control over every perception that comes in our conscious. We have the ability to discern what is healthy and unhealthy. A challenging experience is not always unhealthy…. It is an experience to learn from. We grow with challenges. We have to accept them as a growing experience. Some of these growing experiences are not pleasurable, like tragedy or death. We know they are a part of a life cycle and we are destined to experience this emotion several times in our lives. We will lose contact with loved ones for many reasons other than death. These are life changing experiences that can be perceived as bad. We have to always hold dear our relationships as positive experiences no matter the duration.
Healthy “positive” experiences are the same as “negative” experiences. We have learned to accept each one of them oppositely. We learn from both. We embrace both experiences. One way or another we grow from both. We have to always remember this. We also have to remember it is within our power to change our course to grow out of all of our experiences.
I opened this article with letting go of the stress. We have no choice but to let go. Life should not be stressful. We have one go around according to a humanistic opinion. With all of our beliefs removed at our core we are here once and we need to “make the best of it” I know that is cliché. But it is very true at the root of the statement. Making the best of it is in your hands how you perceive that phrase. When you decide to go forward to explore what your next step is…. Think of what is important. What type of perception has to be in place and what has to be removed from your working conscious?
Love yourself for who, what and where you are at the present moment. Accept that whatever situation you are currently in you made a decision at some point that led you to that point. After you have accepted….. Decide. Decide what it is you want going forward. The only thing you should want is Happiness. Ask for it. Be passionate about this request. In your mind decide that this is the most important thing in your life that you have to achieve on your bucket list. This is the focus the rest of your life. This choice you make to be Happy is internal and cannot be gained through external situations or circumstances. This “happiness” has to become your essence before you can take anything on.
I hope this article has giving you some peace if you are struggling. I always end with Love for all of you. I truly hope that my thoughts bring some relief or hope.
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