Happiness

Forgiveness is the Key to Happiness

Simply put Forgiveness is the intentional and voluntary process by which a victim undergoes a change in feelings and attitude regarding an offense, releases negative emotions such as vengefulness, with an increased ability to wish the offender well. What Forgiveness is not? Or different from?

• Failing to see the action as wrong and in need of forgiveness.
• Not holding the offender as responsible for the action.
• Granted by a representative of society, such as a judge.
• Removing awareness of the offense from consciousness.
• Removing awareness of the offense from consciousness.

Forgiveness is given without an agenda, expectation or to partake in any future exchange.

• In some instances the offender will acknowledge the victims forgiveness and offer the apology after. This would add to easing the transition of the victim from pain to peace of mind. It is not needed once the victim has made a choice to change the mindset or perception towards the situation.

Forgiveness is a mindset and in essence nothing else is needed. It is a choice to let the experience be a negative or not. It is a perception to allow the experience to bring forth pain or not. It is a choice to take on the experience as a life lesson and a reference point to reflect back on.

World Health, Medical, Behavioral Science research indicate that forgiveness promotes dramatic increased positive effects on the mind and body. People who release their resentment and negative feelings towards past events or experiences have increased benefits and less deterioration in cardio vascular and nervous systems. More positive results in a reduction of stress, physical manifestations of stress and increased vitality. People are less likely to be easily angered, hurt and be more optimistic through tough times.

Self-Forgiveness is another story. Environmentally we are conditioned to fear the accountability and to be responsible for our actions. Therefore we run from this “facing the music”. Keeping this guilt, resentment, regret and remorse towards our own actions is unhealthy. We are unhappy because we do not want to face the pain. We think that if we do not let it out and release it, out of embarrassment it is the lesser of the two evils. The embarrassment after acknowledgement is temporary. The pain and damaged caused by keeping this turmoil inside is life changing and permanent to the point of life threatening illnesses caused by the physical manifestation of stress.

• Releasing this pain is healthy. As I pointed out that the acknowledgment causes temporary pain after which you can work on restoring and renewal. It is like physical exercise, you have to work hard to see improvement. You have to sacrifice temporarily in order to see results. In exercise if you keep eating unhealthy and yet still know you are in denial… you will further deteriorate and can cause life threatening illnesses and up to death because of. The short term is to sacrifice, get in shape and then the long term is positive rewards of quality and longevity of life.

We need to love and forgive others. Let go of the pain and discomfort inside of us, It is so damaging. Focus on the good in your life. And if you think there is no good? Take stock. Write a list of the good things and bad things and compare. If your perceptions guide you to write a longer list for the bad things then start working on creating more good situations in your life. Start surrounding yourself with more positive people and remove yourself from the negative environments. There is a way for everything in life. It is now bad do you want it? How bad do you want to be happy? How much longer are you going to be making excuses to be unhappy? I spent a lifetime of helping people become happier and solving their issues with their perceptions, all along my perceptions needed work. I needed to be happier myself. I was not taking my own advice continuing to be in toxic situations and environments that did not help me grow. It is my faith in God that allowed me and drove me to continue to help people. But it was my own misunderstanding that I could apply what I teach to my own life.

(If you are suffering from depression then read my articles on depression) Clinical Depression , Depression Denial Treatment , Depression Facts & Statistics , How to Deal with Depression

As I searched deeper in my mind to why I was not happy the source of my despair was that I was not forgiving myself. I did not see myself as a good person. Because of my inability to love myself I was hurting people in my intimate relationships. What really struck a nerve is when the people I helped succeed in their happiness were the ones that ended up being my teachers and mentors to a happier life. That was rewarding and sad at the same time. I humbled myself and took the counsel and improved. We are an ever evolving species.

We are capable of so much. We are always hungry to learn something new and we thrive on receiving and giving Love. The only way to learn in life is to accept who we are and love ourselves. Forgiveness is a big factor in this journey to happiness. You will learn that once you decide to be happy, forgiveness is a key component to the journey you will take towards sustainable happiness. That is the hard work.

As always. I Love You.

What is Clinical Depression?

Clinical Depression is different from moodiness or a bad mood. It is a medical condition that is still misunderstood by many in the general public, except to those that suffer from it. This perception and misunderstanding compounds the problem for people suffering from depression. The individual experiencing depression feels overwhelming guilt because of the people they affect around them.

Clinical Depression is very simple to understand once the facts are laid out. Of course I am writing from my own research and personal experience for suffering for many years. There are a few types of depression that people deal with.

Major Depression, also known as major depressive disorder or uni-polar depression. The symptoms or characteristics of this type is as follows.

• Sadness and Emptiness
• Lose interest in general daily activities or interests.
• Sleeplessness or insomnia
• Weight fluctuations
• Easily agitated
• Tiredness or lethargy
• Guilt or a sense of worthlessness
• Lacking in focus
• Thoughts of suicide

These are just a few I am sure there are more. I and other people I know have experienced all of the above.

Bipolar Disorder, at this level a person will alternate between depression and mania.

Symptoms:

• Increased Energy
• Insomnia
• Irritability
• Rapid Speech
• Hyper-sexual Behavior
• Racing Thoughts
• Grandiose Ideas
• Greatly Increased Activity
• Impulsive Behaviors
• Poor Judgement

Again as before there are more characteristics and I am sure I could list 20 more.

Causes of Clinical Depression are sometimes vague, misunderstood to the general public and in some cases researchers change their opinion or theories. Treatments will often change because of constant research. This is a growing “epidemic”.

The general consensus of research indicates that clinical depression is inherited. The process of neurotransmitters being produced is in simple terms “broken” this imbalance in the body is passed down generational. Environmental factors will trigger depression in these individuals with this imbalance.

Treatment Clinical Depression– Medicine like antidepressants are a general treatment for the diagnosis. It is a quick fix for short term to get the patient in a calmer state of mind. Therapy is introduced in most cases using the drugs as assistance. (Paxil, Lexapro, Zoloft, Celexa and Prozac).

Psychotherapy with the medication is very successful in the majority of cases Clinical Depression. Group or Individual therapies are used to open the lanes of communicating the feelings and emotions of the patient.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is a popular form of psychotherapy to root out and solve the causes of several mental disorders. The focus of this type of treatment is to change the mindset of unhelpful thinking and behavior.

In the end there is so much more discussion about this affliction. I wanted to share the highlights of what someone you might know is suffering so that you might understand a little better. If you or a loved one is suffering from this it is not the fault of the person or individual. In the majority of the cases it is an imbalance of chemicals in the brain. Although it is something they cannot control being supportive and understanding does help and make a difference. Loving them and expressing to them you have researched and understand what they are feeling is beneficial to people suffering from clinical depression.

My first instict to anyone I speak with that suffers is to “behappy!” I know what they are going through. I feel their pain. I hurt and suffer with them. I am happy around them. I hug the and love them letting them know I understand but I will not give into them even though I know it is a medical condition they cannot control. I will show them joy and usually more often that not they are receptive to my love. I hope this helps. I Love All of You! Please. If you have a choice. Choose to be Happy. It is worth the fight and the Work.

How to Live in the Present

When I look in the mirror I am very critical. I want to be the best me I can be. I know I have my failures and I am very aware of the imperfections that compose my character. I know that my imperfections make me. I accept all of me all the time and I am happy to be me. If I am a person that helps others I need to love myself and appreciate where I am at in the present. I cannot be wishy washy and unsure of who I am.
I have been helping people deal with their demons and depression for many years. I am not a professional but I have always been a go to person for anyone and everyone. Since I was at a very young age I have been a magnet for this stuff. I never turn people away. Years ago when I was suffering from anxiety and depression I would help people as I would flirt with suicide, self-destructive attitudes and no one would know this. Yet I never turned anyone away. Why? Because I believed if I turned someone away, someone would turn their back on me one day. This has happened to me. Helping people and seeing them improve is an amazing experience. Changing the perception and mindset of someone with a toxic way of thinking is very rewarding. It is not about my ego I find enjoyment it is the satisfaction that someone will not feel what I was feeling anymore.
Today I am happy. My mindset is positive 85 percent of the time. I am always going to struggle with my depression and anxiety. I found out it is in my genes. It is hereditary and in the makeup of one of my parents. I cannot deny this. I have to embrace it to the point where I am aware of it so I can see it as it arrives in my consciousness. It is like a huge dark cloud on the horizon. You see it coming and you prepare. You get everything ready and prepare for the worse. When the storm comes you get what you get and try to come out of it alive and with minimal damage. You cannot avoid the storm. It is on its way. There is no running from it. So prepare for whatever is going to arrive. It is like death. It will come eventually. Prepare for it. Do not worry about it because it is inevitable. Enjoy the now. Give yourself an opportunity to thrive.
I teach Happiness. I do not solve people problems. I observe the mindset of people and help them with their awareness of the deficiencies in their happiness. I truly believe that if we are happy we can solve any problems and address situations with a clear and focused plan. If our thoughts are organized and open to flexibility we can grow. IF we are positive we can grow! Yes. We have the capacity in that state of mind to look back and learn from the minute before. We can be happy in the present and appreciate the relief we feel and the negativity is an afterthought. If we practice this on a regular basis we can condition our minds to remain in the positive mindset because it is more natural and feels good.
I make it sound very simple. It is simple to make a decision to be happy and it is very hard work to remain in that state of mind. But like anything else in life we have to work hard to reap the rewards of training. When I look in the mirror I see a man that has been through a lifetime of experiences. I see a person that knows how to love unconditionally. I can truly look at my “enemies” and love them. They are not enemies. They are my brothers and sisters that have not yet experience awareness of who they are and where they are in the present.

The point here is to love yourself. Accept your present. Do not expect anything except to love and be loved. Live today. Appreciate the present and use the experience of awareness and teach others.
As always I love you! I am here for you. I write for you.
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I am overwhelmed right now with the thought of how to structure my posts and words that I need to use to get more attention from you the reader. I am losing sight of what was the purpose for my blog in the first place. I do research and try to have a relevant post so anyone can understand and it flows. In the end it all doesn’t matter as long as I connect with you. If I am myself, eventually someone will view my writing as relevant and will connect with my thoughts and views. I do not really care whether the masses agree with me. I am speaking and writing on something that will help people. What I write will help the majority. Those who disagree can find someone else they can agree with. I want everyone to find a voice they can relate to because the important thing here is that we find something or someone to connect with that will help us change our mindset into a positive one.

I write from my heart, experiences and what I observe through my readings and conversations with people. I give the wisdom of my soul an outlet to teach people to love and learn how to be happy and have a life purpose. If what little I know is helpful I will be living an abundant fulfilled life. I have been finding out that the search engines are recording record numbers with the phrase “how to be happy”. Can you imagine?! People actually want to be happy. I thought this world was going to hell and a handbasket. I was losing all hope for humanity and was just waiting to die so I can either move on from this body or transition to nothingness. We do not have a choice in the matter. We are certainly going to die. Our waking conscious will stop. We will be out like a broken porchlight. The other side of that has always been a mystery. It isn’t like someone took a camera with them to prove the existence of another dimension that our energy transfers to and our conscious is aware.

Awareness of this reality we are living in and our perception of it is crucial in our lives. Do we just exist and live aimlessly or do we try and find a purpose for ourselves. If there is nothingness waiting for us what would we have to gain for finding purpose? Is it going to get us something in return? If we think that nothingness is waiting for us then there are no morals to worry about nor any fear or guilt. If we know there is nothing then what are we afraid of…? We should be happy. We should live our lives to experience whatever it is we want to and create for ourselves a wonderful experience. It would be selfish of us to disrespect the person next to us and ruin their experience in life if all we have is a one time around and then it is done. It would be horrible of us to create a toxic environment for our fellow human being if there is nothingness after we are finished and they were trying to make the best experience and it was tainted by your negative outlook and perception.

Our choices are clear. If there is nothingness at the end of our experience here then to decide to live a happy and positive life is the best thing to do because all we have is one go around. Experience life with respecting everyone around you feeling good about yourself and understanding that our mortality serves as a reminder that we have to decide correctly once. If we wake up the next day we have to understand we have another chance to be well. To experience amazing.

I truly believe we have been created and there is something and we have a life purpose. I feel connection to this world and everyone in it. I know that there is a something at the end of this. What I have seen and learned has given me a belief in something great.

I write to help you realize that happiness is the best choice to figure out your problems and focus on your life purpose. If you are happy you have a clear mind to help you focus on the answer. I write because I feel in my essence that we have a purposeful life and we need to figure it out, experience joy will open up the doors by attracting people that want to be around you and want to experience life the way you are. I write because my purpose is to help people, I am passionate about it. I am not a perfect person. I do not carry degrees to give me the authority, license nor do I need them in order to love and share to people what I am about. I am me and I love you.

I speak and share from the heart unconditionally. If you want to join me message me. Subscribe to my blog and get updates. Join our forum. Share this blog to everyone you know through your social accounts. We have to start healing from or negative mindset and stop wasting time and FIND your LIFE Purpose!