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I Finally Did It! I recorded the You Tube!

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Sometimes we find ourselves borderline with death and life. Our minds are always exploring the avenue of depression and misery. We have voices from the past trying to convince us that lies are the truth. That the truth is relevant as a choice. We argue with those thoughts and days weeks months go by and we just get by. We waste time worrying about all the aspects of our sadness that we lose precious time enjoying our loved ones around us.

For those that are alone you waste time feeling sorry and do not ever move on to create a new life for yourself. Free of attachments. Travel and move anywhere to meet new people. There are so many situations we can talk about where there could be a good excuse to be miserable. If we are alive then there is hope to create something special.

I recently put myself in a situation where it is out of my comfort zone. It is scary for anyone that does not have the courage to face something new and is not able to create with confidence. It takes courage for someone to change in stride. I am not saying that we should stop what we are doing and do what we love and are passionate about. That would be absurd. We should never want to re-think our lives to be happier if we are already comfortable. Never!!! We need security. We need low risk situations where we can just settle and be safe. Happiness is relevant isn’t it? It isn’t really happiness it is craziness to want to laugh all the time going to and from work. Laugh when you collect that check from something that you enjoy doing while everyone is working overtime and barely making ends meet.

Do not do that. Do not enjoy life. I beg you. Settle for the people over you that do not appreciate how amazing you are. Do not get out of your comfort zone and make yourself uncomfortable sacrificing that comfort for the payoff of making a living at something you love to do. Do not put the hard work in for a passion where you work for 10-12 hours a day in something that is amazing and fulfilling to you. NO! That would be a bad idea. That is so CRAZY that you cannot even think of it you selfish person you.

You are a hypocrite! Can’t we all just get a long at work and be happy? I made some mistakes in my career and my life where I let my emotions get the best of me, I let my weaknesses get the best of me, I let my temper get the best of me, I let my principles get me in trouble and I did not stick with my principles at times. I got away from going to a place where other people rejoice in life and pray together earnestly and honestly in a non-judgmental way. Don’t look at me with those eyes like you are innocent you hypocrite! I love you! I will always love you even though you think of nothing but hate towards me. I will always stretch out my hands in hopes that you will accept my gift of love and kindness, friendship and goodwill. Instead look at me with those righteous eyes. How Dare You?! I answer in love. I love you. Period.

This is a rant. This is how the mind works when you are in the process of meditating. This is how we can go back and forth from emotion to thought and never get anywhere. We have to not listen to the lies. We have to block out the voices. The voices can be so damaging. The voices of the past and our fears all balled up into one. Relax. Love and be happy.

I was meditating this morning. My definition of meditating is sitting in a room by myself or in a very noisy crowded room where no-one knows me and I can focus on myself. If no one knows me I do not have to worry about any one interrupting my focus. If I can focus on my thoughts in a crowded noisy venue then I am meditating. I can use the busy noises as a soothing calming sound. Repetitious sounds. If you sit in a busy train station or airport you can block out the details and just focus on the human music. You don’t even have to close your eyes, just stare at an inanimate object…not at someone! Then you might have security talking to you. Get a book to stare at. Anything…… Phone, paper, cup……you get it. As you are staring your sight becomes blurry and that is when you hold it. Pay attention to the thoughts that come in. Are they relevant at the moment? Is it something that is pressing? Do you need it to focus on it? As you’re sorting out and filing your thoughts you will not hear the background sounds. In fact they will blur out. Once you have dismissed all of the noise and irrelevant thoughts you are left with silence. If there are thoughts that are not able to remove like a nasty icon on your PC that is a virus…. Then focus on that thought and ask “Why?” Why are you there? What is it that is so important that you are staying around? Why are you lingering? Ask the thought questions like it is a person. Interrogate it! Tell it to return tomorrow! Rationalize and get angry at it. Ask the thought if it can wait. Make a deal with it…”If we agree to address your concern I promise to debate with you tomorrow.” Then after it agrees shut the door and continue with your focus.

Sometimes we cannot just ignore these thoughts when we are trying to focus on happiness and love during our quiet time and or meditation. Sometimes we have to strike a deal with ourselves at first so that we may get used to quieting our minds. Eventually you will appreciate the peace of focusing on yourself that the next time you are going through that transitionary period in your state of mind, you will be angry when those nasty, interrupting thoughts pop up . They will only pop up when you are trying to calm down. You don’t think of that stuff all day long and then there it is when you need to be clear minded the most. Just like when and if you are at work and it is slow and there is nothing to do…. And the end of the day someone calls you over for help and you have five minutes left till you go home. That is the feeling. Negotiate with your thoughts sometimes. Pacify them. Be as sneaky as they are. These are the thoughts that create fear. These are the thoughts when you are getting ready to make a decision that you know is good for you and at the last second you hear a whisper, “Are you sure?” Very subtle. A small little voice, “pssst, Screw the diet… Just one little bite. It won’t hurt”. I can get really explicit and detailed about the tempting situations. I think the point has been made. Negotiating is only for one purpose, not to compromise but to make the thought go away until tomorrow. Spend the rest of the day preparing for tomorrow when the thought returns. Practice in your thoughts, “I Am Stronger than that silly thought”. Affirm this with emotion and passion! Scream it in your head. Love the affirmation as if it is the truth. If you think it is the truth then hold on to that truth.

What does meditation Do? Do you even know? Have you wondered what it is if you do not know? Have you said to yourself it is too hard and you cannot do it? I just showed you how. That is the rawest form of meditation. It works. Meditation for me is a way to train my mind to change the current state it is in. I want to be happy. I sometimes cannot just turn the sad off and be happy. I have to get use to the idea. The only way to get used to an idea is to study about it. Practice and condition yourself to being oipen to something new. When someone prepares, studies, trains and such… it is a repetitious act or motion. You fall, make a little error, re-focus and improve each time. Everything we do in life is a learning event. We always are challenged with something before we can excel at it. Conditioning your mind is the same as training for a physical event. You have to imagine you are doing it to believe you can do it before you can actually do it. We have to imagine we are happy all the time before we can be happy all the time. We have to quiet our minds and remove all of the doubt in order to accept and focus on the happiness and joy that is already inside of us in the first place. We have all that clutter and stuff blocking the door that we open to reveal that the joy was inside of us all of the time.

The answer is always inside of us. It is like a hidden room for some of us because it is a way of thinking that we have not been around for a very long time. Or we have been around it but we could not appreciate it. We will have spurts and episodes of joy in our lives from external events stimulating us and giving us tastes of happiness, but that is not created internally. As soon as the event is over the happiness wears off. If we create it internally and protect it, re-affirm it, nurture it, and condition your mind daily it will continue to grow stronger. This kind of happiness will get us through the tragedy. Tragedy will happen, loss will happen. You will have you happiness and joy to look forward to once the external pain wears down. YES. Pain is external. Happiness is internal. We believe that it is the other way around.

External circumstances cause us to be unhappy because we do not feel joy internally, as I outlined above. Ok. I will leave you with that thought. Meditate on it.

As always I Love You!

Update on the You Tube thing. I have a little whisper in my ear that I am not good enough to record them. Yikes. I better read my own posts! LOL